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Video transcript (PDF, new window)
You may not think of yourself as a 'carer' but if you are a partner, relative or friend of someone who has a chest, heart or stroke condition, and involved in their care this term applies to you.
Carers, whatever your age or circumstances, need information, practical help and support. Your encouragement and support, combined with the right professional guidance, can make a big difference to the person you care for.
As a carer it is important that you feel supported and able to cope. We are here to support you as well as the person you care for. Support we can offer includes:
You can achieve a lot by being honest and open with your partner (or the person you care for) and with yourself. Try not to be overprotective. You are not in charge of your their illness. You can’t make him / her healthy but, if you’re overprotective, you can make him / her feel like an invalid.
There will be bad days. Don’t be discouraged. Remind yourself that negative thoughts are just that: thoughts, not facts. Be determined not to let the illness take over both your lives. Your partner is not a victim; neither are you. Make a list of activities both of you could enjoy. Plan to do at least one every day.
Make bargains with your partner, e.g. ‘If you do your exercises, I’ll make the tea’. If your partner is afraid to do something that you know he or she can actually do, don’t do it. Ask yourself ‘Am I doing this for my partner or am I doing it for myself, so I can feel useful?’
Find things to do at home that will take your mind off worrying about your partner. Take a break, away from the house. Ask family or friends to stay if you are anxious about leaving your partner alone.
Above all try to remember that you are not alone. It is ok to ask for help and support.